We've an office in the beautiful town of St Peter Port in Guernsey. You can find us at the top of Smith Street. Give us a knock! We have a beer fridge and a pool table. And amazing views of Herm.
(Don't worry about the lions - they're plastic, and mostly harmless.)
We have a fax machine but unfortunately it ran out of paper in 1987. The roof-mounted lasers are trained to shoot down carrier pigeons, it's just a smidge too windy in our tower to receive smoke signals and there's something about morse code that just makes us drowsy.
So if you don't have a Telex, you could email us. Whatever sinks your ship. Just please.... we hate spam as much as you do. (Cat pics and/or hilarious misadventures are OK, tho.)
Speak soon xx